Little Miss Businda!!

Well - It's been very hectic and the atmosphere in Hefei is definitely different than in Beijing. And...we can't WAIT TO COME HOME! We took a trip to the orphanage yesterday and even before that trip, Mary has experienced moments of confusion,even though she has developed a healthy attachment to me. She IS attaching to Robert, he seems to be her play buddy and boy, does she LOVE to play with him. When it comes to cuddling, she's still very shy and uncomfortable with it. But the people in Hefei are very .......forward. Good intentions of course, but Mary has been literally picked up by a man in the elevator and she was pretty much a celebrity at the Carrefour!!! Truly, thank God we had the card from our agency to explain to the locals why we had this beautiful Chinese baby. Most women, nod their head in approval, say, "lucky baby" but more than anything, people were commenting on Mary's beauty. Our guide Yvonne, was translating their comments back so we were very flattered and man, I truly wished we had brought our camera as she truly IS beautiful. But in all the commotion and admiration, this has a tendancy to confuse her as when we get back to the hotel room and settle down, you can almost read it in her eyes, "What am I doin' with THESE people"???? The orphanage was very traumatic for Mary and for another mother and myself just because we felt that our babies thought they were returning and then we had to whisk them away........again!!!!! SO - we got through it, praise GOD! I can promise you that every day is better, stronger, more laughs, hugs and very tender!!!! So here are some things about Mary and every day reveals more depth to this incredible little girl that God has placed in our lives. I swear, He could not have hand picked a better fit for Robert and I!!! Sweet Mary: When she is in the middle of playing or walking or whatever and just opens her arms up and falls into mine. Or when she reaches up inside my sleeve and starts rubbing my shoulder. The eye contact between us is incredible and regarding attachment techniques, we are definitely the exception! Funny Mary: This little comic has more facial expressions than I do!!!!! She does it all with a sneaky, mischievious smile or a giggle. She's VERY animated and loves bobbing her head or pointing her fingers and/or hands as if she's giving someone the brush-off which leads to----- Mary with an Attitude!: We figured this came from being so small and having to fend for herself on the playground or with her foster siblings! For 28 months old, she wears about 18 mos but is pretty good in 24 months clothing. SO - the families agreed that apparently, there is NO referee on the playground in addition to the fact that the children are VERY territorial!!!! For instance, little Alanna Videon came into our room while we are playing and of course, we play pretty hard and Mary is eating, spilling and tossing Cheerios left and right. At one exchange she throws a handful of Cheerios at Alanna's face! YIKES! Alanna gives it right back and they both seem really good with it! One day I made Mary really angry (was it when I gave her the suppository?) and she just glared at me. So as I placed the bath toys beside her on the night stand to play with, she knocked them off, shrugged her shoulders, cocked her head like some Mafia gangster was saying, "You want a piece of me"?! ?!? No lie! It's pretty funny for now, we'll see how it plays out at home! Another scenario was when we were all on our way to the orphanage, little Joey Lutz came down the bus aisle and was admiring Mary's buddy, Curious George. Now Mary was really having nothing to do with George at the time, but Jeoy just picked him up to look at him and baby girl started to scream at him, lunged for George and Joey was very sweet to understand that for right now, George was Mary's security blanket. SO - Mary is now clinging to George when all of a sudden, little Joey comes back down the aisle and with no provocation, Mary starts using George as a weapon and tries slinging poor George at little Joey!!!! I pull her back and thank God, Jim and Tina Lutz have raised such a gracious, wise, understanding little boy! Mary likes to scratch little kids as a gesture of "hello" as well.....once again, we think this is playground ritual for the SWI in Hefei. She doesn't do that anymore......Sunday School i n Fairview ought to be interesting once she gets acclimated!!! Scared Mary: Baby girl's big brown eyes get really serious and wide when she's feeling that something's about to go down......like bedtime, daddy picking her up, or her antibiotics (she was presented to us with a bad upper respiratory infection which is going away, thank God!) As tough as she can present when she plays, this is when you can really see how vulnerable she really is. She really searches everyone and everything out, and Robert and I both believe can pretty well assess a situation out as her foster mother confirmed, that Mary is very 'clever'. Genius Mary: You won't believe this! As Robert and I are just talking about going out and about in the hotel yesterday, we're discussing where to go and just out of nowhere, I said, "Mary, go get daddy's shoes" - Mary went straight for Robert's shoes, picked them up and HANDED THEM TO HIM!!!!! And she doesn't know english!!!! OMG!!!!! I think she's very attuned to our vocal tones and body language but that one, left us with our jaws hanging wide open! She's very curious, and LOVES electronics! Anytime we have the cameras out, or are pushing buttons, she's ON IT and just pushing and really looking at everything! At one point, she successfully locked Robert out of the safe AND cell phone! Robert thought she is already an analytical thinker in the way that she studies objects or toys, pretty much takes them apart and puts them back, very organized. I suppose the way Robert did when he used to take a lawnmower apart and put it back together!!!!!!Her referral described her as being fond of imitating and that is an understatement - she is a master observer and whatever you do once, she pretty much has it down and constantly astounds Robert and I that she does it again the next day without any prompting! Robert lovingly reminds me that good or bad, we ARE the example!!!! Creative Mary: As Robert and I have gone through our water bottles and cans of Pringles, we've been using them for toys and percussion instruments! Mary Loves It! She can really shake her booty too, to music. She has this little dance move where she wiggling her booty, shaking her hands and turing around in a circle! It's awesome! Girly Girl Mary: Until this morning, Mary would wake up crying....like any toddler, I suppose but one of the first things we do after she gets a dry pull up on is that she LOVES me to brush and fix her hair!!!!! That seems to get her day started right, even before it's shampooed. Today, I filed her little fingernails, as it looks like they were always clipped or peeled off. She loved that too and I'm hoping that if she wants to use them to claw one of her peers to say, "hi", that her little 'manicure' will lessen the sting of that initial impression. In sum, Mary fits right in and we recognize a few areas beyond the avereage toddler that will require mine and Roberts commitment, attention and support. It's obvious she has never learned to crawl, she's SO wobbly but we're working on it and she's catching on it a little bit. I'm sure we'll get better instruction when we take her to Vanderbilt when we get home. Also, she's never, EVER been out in public, so she has no idea of what is expected of her, behavior or manners wise and the language barrier compounded with that I'm sure, makes it tougher for her. But even still, God never gives us more than we can handle and we feel that since Mary truly is a perfect fit for us and our family that God knew we were the ones that could help her blossom and grow to be the woman that God sees her! We are so delighted in her, our love for her grows stronger every minute, we discover something new about her every day and she' becoming more and more comfortable, just like family. We just ca n't WAIT for you to meet her but here's one big warning........... She gives GREAT HUGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -- Ronda B! Love hard, play hard, laugh hard